My Mistakes

Lately I feel as if I've been making so many mistakes and quite honestly I think it's becoming a very unwanted cycle in my life. I wish I could put the blame on others but truth is, it's mostly my fault for letting any of it happen. Sometimes it feels so hard to take responsibility for my actions. Running away and pretending it never happened would be so much easier. But what kind of woman would that make me if I did? It would mean compromising my integrity and voiding everything that makes me who I am as a person. hence the stress of taking the road less traveled a.k.a responsibility. But I digress.

I suppose if i would make better decisions I wouldn't end up in such predicaments quite often as I usually do. But how does one know if every decision they make will always be the right one? How would they know that when all is said and done that things could very well end up the complete opposite of what the intended? Yes we may have the best intentions but how do we know that our final decision won't end up disastrous?

I would love to say that the silver lining in all this is that my mistakes seem to hurt no one but myself. But still at the end of the day someone IS in fact getting hurt. And always too late i realize that whatever happened could always have been prevented from the start. The key words being "Too Late". I can never see the flaws in my decisions until they actually happen. And I feel as if that's one of MY major flaws. One that i would hope to correct but feel as if I'll never be able to.

I think the only self preservation I have is my ability to accept my mistakes and and take as much responsibility for them that is necessary. Without it i'd probably spend my days feeling sorry for myself and really who wants to be that person?

Well I think that's enough venting for one day:)

Until Later... LOVEY